


Bokuto Gets An Ugly Cat

by i-eat-the-whole-ass (pleasejustno)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, special guest: an ugly cat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-10
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-05 23:39:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5394539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pleasejustno/pseuds/i-eat-the-whole-ass
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>no better time to write fic than during finals season : )</p>
    </blockquote>





	Bokuto Gets An Ugly Cat

**Author's Note:**

> no better time to write fic than during finals season : )

Kenma initiates a conversation for the first time that Saturday.

"Bokuto got a cat."

Not really paying attention as he's too focused on taking out the pickles from his burger, Kuroo gives a non-committal noise in response. "Uh huh... How'd you know that before I did?"

"Keiji told me."

"You been hanging with him?"

Slim fingers steal one of Kuroo's fries away. Kenma's a noisy chewer, the opposite of his quiet nature. Sometimes the noises he makes when eating grosses Kuroo out a little but he doesn't complain.

"Just texting."

"Show me," Kuroo looks up at him as he chomps down on his now pickle-free burger.

Kenma gives him a horrified look in return. "What?"

Confused, Kuroo's munching slows. "What _what_?"

"Why do you wanna see my texts with Keiji?"

"No, you silly! I meant Bokuto's cat!"

Another fry disappears off Kuroo's tray.

"Oh. I don't have any pictures. And you're going to Bokuto's house tomorrow, aren't you? You can see it then," Kenma shrugs at him.

"Right... I forgot. Also, why are you so scared of me wanting to look at your text exchanges with Akaashi?" Kuroo grins suggestively at him, "Are you two talking about... _Naughty_ things?"

There's a swift kick delivered to his shin from under the table and he yelps out in pain, almost dropping his burger.

" _No_." The look Kenma directs at him could kill an ordinary man, but Kuroo was no ordinary man and so was barely threatened by that. The kick really hurt, though.

"I'm sorry," Kuroo whimpers, real tears in his eyes, "Here, take as many fries as you want, take it all." He pushes the tray of fries towards Kenma like a peasant offering gifts to a king, and Kenma grabs a handful of them, stuffing them into his mouth. He even takes a large gulp of Kuroo's drink just because he could.

Kuroo watches him in awe.

"You sure you really don't want to get anything to eat here? I can't let you go home hungry."

"I'm not your baby, Kuroo," Kenma says, giving him an unamused look.

"But you are," Kuroo sings, dragging out the vowels, and he gets another kick in the shin. On the same exact leg. "Ow! You really need to stop doing that, Kenma!"

Kuroo's display of pain makes Kenma smile at his phone screen (he's playing a game on it with one hand), and Kuroo rubs at his hurting shin with his free hand before resuming polishing off the remains of his meal, the former stealing away fries every now and then.

 

* * *

 

"That is one _ugly_ cat," Kuroo whistles, scrutinizing the black cat lazing in the middle of the floor of Bokuto's bedroom.

"You're mean! He's not ugly," Bokuto throws a tissue sheet at Kuroo, and it falls to the floor, the cat immediately perking up at the sight of it and going to chase it.

Bokuto laughs watching it. "He's so cute, look at him!"

"Ugly," Kuroo whispers to himself, frowning.

The tissue is shredded apart in moments, and Bokuto has to squat to pick up the pieces of it as the cat swats at his hands.

"What street did you pick him up off?"

"I fucking bought him, you ass!" Bokuto scowls up at him, offended.

"Get a refund," Kuroo says, going to sit down cross-legged on the end of Bokuto's bed, still frowning at the cat.

"Stop hurting him!"

"He doesn't even understand what I'm saying! Bokuto, you got cheated! His fur is a mess and he looks _old_. And ugly."

Bokuto stands, throwing the tissue shreds into the bin by his desk, and uses his foot to hold back the cat when it tries to chase the shreds into the bin again.

"He was on discount. And he's really not that old. Besides, he likes to play around, and I think that's way better than having a cat that ignores you." He goes to sit next to Kuroo on the bed, and together they watch the cat knead the carpet on the floor then roll over onto its back to stare up at the both of them.

"What's his name?"

"Kuroo!" Bokuto chirps without hesitation.

" _Why?!_ "

"Because then I'll always have an excuse to call out your name even when you're not here!"

"Eh... Are you sure it's not so that you're not suspected of masturbating when you call out my name anymore..."

Bokuto wrestles him flat onto his back on the bed, embarrassed. "No! I never call your name when I masturbate!"

Kuroo grins up at him. " _Sure_ you don't."

Still embarrassed, Bokuto shuts him up with a kiss.

It turns into a full make-out session and things start getting a little hot and heavy, but Kuroo pulls away after a while. "It's weird, the cat's watching us."

"Call 'the cat', 'Kuroo'. He has a name," Bokuto rolls off of him to watch the cat again.

"Yeah, _my_ name," Kuroo sits up and grimaces at him.

"He's stretching his legs! Damn, he's so cute I could cry!" Bokuto's eyes are bright with pure joy and amusement.

It quite makes Kuroo happy just watching his boyfriend being happy over his pet, no matter how ugly that pet may be.

"He's licking his bumhole."

"You can't destroy the reality of how great my cat is, Kuroo. No matter how hard you try," Bokuto shakes his head at him.

"Woah. He just flashed us his furry balls. Gross."

"Quit being a hater," Bokuto laughs, "He's got big, fluffy balls. I love them."

"You touch them?"

"Hell yeah I do. They're soft and clean, why not?"

The expression on Kuroo's face in reply makes Bokuto shake with hysterical laughter.

"Ok but do you love my balls more than you love his balls?" Kuroo asks, "This is the Boyfriend Compatibility question, better choose your answer carefully."

"Yeah, I love your balls more!"

Kuroo hums, thinking up something else. "Volleyballs or my balls?"

"..."

"Come on," Kuroo leans towards him cheekily, resting his chin on Bokuto's shoulder.

"Hard question but I'd say... Your balls."

"I love you."

"Love you, too."

"Really? Change the name of your cat."

Bokuto tilts his head towards Kuroo's face and pokes him with his hair. "No."

"Ow. Your hair went into my eye."

"I'm sorry," Bokuto worriedly starts fussing over him, Kuroo squinting his eyes as if in pain.

"Just kidding, hehe."

With a huff, Bokuto tackles him down onto the bed again.

Kuroocat watches them from the floor, wondering what those two big creatures are doing that is making the bed creak and groan like that before it goes back to licking its balls clean contentedly.

 

* * *

 

The next weekend, Kuroo's at Bokuto's house again, the latter having run out to the shops to get some groceries for his mother on last-minute notice.

It's just Kuroo and Kuroocat in Bokuto's bedroom now.

Kuroo's brought a toy he bought at the pet store last week for Kuroocat. (He was starting to feel more affectionate towards the cat as time went by but he'd never tell Bokuto so.)

"Hey, Kuroo," Kuroo calls out, swishing the cat toy around, squatting and resting his chin on his knee.

It definitely feels a little weird to be calling out his own name for a cat, and an ugly one at that.

The cat chases the toy, and Kuroo lifts it higher then drags it across the floor quickly, leaving the cat rolling around.

He giggles at that, his eyes following the cat's every movement.

"Okay, maybe you're kind of cute."

Kuroocat sits up and looks at him, a smug expression on its face.

Moments pass as they both stare at each other.

"Nope, still ugly," human Kuroo concludes, smiling down at it, and swishes the toy around again.

**Author's Note:**

> hey i just wanna know...if the fic is relatively tame with just some curse words thrown about, should the G rating be acceptable or is the T rating more appropriate? i've never figured it out
> 
> edit: it's T now :3c
> 
> also i made kenma call akaashi 'keiji' because he calls hinata 'shouyou' so i just feel like that's what he'd call akaashi (can't remember if he's ever spoken to akaashi or not...)


End file.
